What a doozy of a week, weekend, past days since we’ve spoken, whirlwind of events.
I didn’t know “doozy” was a real word but I trust autocorrect. WOW we are off to a good start on this blog post – I learned a casual word from my childhood is actually a word, and you get to read my pointless rant about it. Kinda like how this last week was for me. I spent a lot of time chasing my thoughts, learning a few things in the midst of the hunt. Did I get any further on making a decision? No. Did I have a slight breakthrough on my life direction? Yes. Progress.
Last week I made the transition from my Phsy Ed class to the grade 2 classroom. I had a lot of downtime (aka too much time alone with myself) since I was out of Phys Ed on Monday and didn’t start grade 2 until Thursday. Parent-teacher interviews were held on Wednesday (note the super official name card below) from 1pm – 7pm, meaning we were at the school for 12 hours. I was busy every day after school last week and worked two days for 12 or more hours. Still with me? Good, cause I’m lost just thinking about it. It was a lot of calendar fillers with not much action, leaving the mind with a surplus of open space to get lost and overwhelmed and anxious about nothing.
This weekend was another story. Friday was Friday Night Live (school talent show), which was so incredible and heart warming. The students had been practicing for weeks and it showed. Props to Mrs. Dempster for pulling off a smooth show! Saturday I saw Jinwoo and we did multiplication and subtraction on his whiteboard (like what?! He’s FIVE), then proceeded to run away from the very scary “dinosaur”, his 2 year old brother, for 20 minutes. Oh, and he made me play “shape up” which I found out is actually just a contest of who can hold the plank position the longest, do the most pushups, and last the longest doing squats. I am sad to say he beat me in both the plank and pushups, due to a mix of me being a narcissistic blob of self pity the past few weeks, and the fact he doesn’t enjoy losing. Really he’s just a ball of energy and I’m a blob of donuts.
I came home from Jinwoo’s and headed straight to the US Embassy pool for the afternoon with some colleagues. The vitamin D was fullforce and fierce and wonderful. We returned, I made some peanut butter and practiced yoga at a friends, and came home to a locked door. Thankfully Kimberley was incredibly kind and invited me to eat supper with herself and her sweet little boy, Samuel. Woke up Sunday feeling recharged, sat down and had a little epiphany. Not sure if it was the caffeine in my tea or the colliding of events and things in my life, but some serious life planning happened and it feels good to have a goal, and see the steps I need to take to reach it. Another 6 months of Africa really doesn’t get me further up the ladder on this five year plan which, along with my health, is why I am still humming and huhing.
That brings us to the rest of Sunday. A staff member here, Nelson, invited us to a multicultural celebration in his village. It was so incredibly liberating to leave our compound lives behind for just a few hours. Nelson is in high regards in his village so we were treated fairly. There was dancing, singing, drumming, traditional outfits of different kinds, and the locals were drinking palm wine. People were friendly for the most part and very welcoming (this includes allowing us to take pictures which doesn’t happen!). Brett was in his glory and we saw little of him as he dashed around, finally having the freedom to photograph as he wished. And, as usual, he snapped some pretty awesome shots. Brett and I snuck into the crowd to take some quick pictures amongst the excitement before leaving. A few quick snaps turned into a dancing ring of “watch white girl try and dance”. We returned home through what I would refer to as “locals only” streets, but we finally made it and joined our colleagues at the Mexican themed potluck in our little teacher community compound.
I know this post is unusually chronological and step by step for me, but I wanted to show you I am doing fine. Still feeling a little lost, but finding my path at school, in Yaounde, and also in my own head. I am still hunting for an answer but doing so with added awareness, presence, and persistence. So, am I making a decision today? Well, not as of 4pm, no.
All my heart,